With Littles

Emmalee is the best at making an event out of a normal everyday day.  She decided we HAD to go to the Disney Store at the Mall of America and attend the Zootopia event they were hosting.  While we were at the MOA we might as well see the movie....and how better to enjoy it all than with BFF Ruthie!

Madison and I were allowed to go along incase these cute littles needed someone to hold the American Girl Dolls at the Disney store and the Disney dolls in the American Girl Store.  Whatever.  Share some hot theater popcorn with me and I will go along with just about anything ;0}

We checked out the Lea Adventure Academy they are having over spring break.  If you are near an American Girl store be sure to sign up!  Last year we just happened to show up at the store on one of the days and were so sad to miss out on all of it because prior registration was required.

I had already decided, premeditated style, to buy these girls a matching outfit for their dolls since they play together with their dolls so much.  We walked the entire store twice studying each and every outfit.  In the end, after a little arm twisting, these girlies decided they HAD TO HAVE musical instruments for their dolls instead of clothes.  

I love it!  I knew when this blond babe was in my belly that she would love music.  Every time a song played she jumped in my belly.  Ruthie loves music too, joined the band at school this year, so the doll instruments were pretty much perfect for these two.

After enduring several impromptu concerts I convinced the girls we should sew.

Serious fashion designs were sketched.  Two small knit t-shirts were lovingly sewn by excited little fingers.  Emmalee decided to put a violin on her t-shirt for her doll.

Ruthie designed a flute for the front of hers.  

We played until nearly 10pm when Ruthie had to go and our party dissolved into bedtime.

Ruthie went home, Emmers went to bed, and I sat there so totally happy.  I was in heaven today playing and sewing with these Littles.  The giggles and smiles and squeals of delight were simply intoxicating.  I have come to discover I REALLY ENJOY teaching other people, no matter their size, how to sew and paint and create.  What a fulfilling way to spend your time, using your energy and mind and all the working parts you are blessed with to shape and mold and create something from ingredients.  

Do yourself a favor.  Create something today.

Feed My Starving Children

Madison and I got to go on a CyberSchool field trip last week to a great organization in Eagan, Minnesota called Feed My Starving Children.  

Anyone can sign up to volunteer.  Our church youth group has gone to Feed My Starving Children several times over the past few years, but this was a first time for Madison and I.  

We started out in the "classroom" where we were educated on the goals of the foundation, what was going into the meal we would be packaging, and exactly how the work would be done.  This kind man explained that the kids getting food, most of them are absolutely starving.  One bag we were about to pack was enough food to make 6 cups of prepared food.  One bag was enough to feed 6 people, each getting one cup of rice/ingredients a day.  He explained that while we might think one cup is not very much, most have been starving so long that their tummies can't actually handle a whole cup of food.  They may only be able to eat 1/3 or 1/2 cup for a while until their stomachs stretch and adjust to having food again.

Each bag got a scoop of vitamins and flavor, a scoop of dehydrated veggies, like potatoes and carrots for color and flavor, a coffee mug of soy for protein, and a coffee mug of rice for carbohydrates.

Everyone gets to wear one of these stylish hair nets.  

The level of organization and thought put into their process is commendable.  We watched a video that showed just what order to put the ingredients in, how to measure properly so that each bag meets the nutritional requirements and is packaged safely, complete with tips and tricks to make each station more efficient.  I am a freak about organizing large group projects and I was super impressed!

Each volunteer had a spot.  Each station could function with 6-10 people.  In addition to the video we watched before coming into the packing room, there were laminated cards everywhere with instructions just in case someone forgot or didn't listen.  Once we started packing, we were a flurry of excitement for an hour.  Little guys were passing quickly through the isles refilling soy and rice constantly.  Our group here worked pretty quickly and we never had the chance to run out of supplies.  

Bags were opened and placed on the funnel, scoops of vitamins, veggies, soy and rice were added.  Each bag was weighed, sealed, then packed by 36 into boxes.  The goal is one box per volunteer by the end of an hour.  We had 90 volunteers that day and we managed to all pack 144 boxes of meals.

I was also amazed to see a table or two of special needs volunteers.  It warmed my heart to see an organization not only ready to accommodate 90 or more unskilled workers, many there for the first time, but also with a plan in place for volunteers with special needs.  They were able to dig in and participate, leaving with a feeling of accomplishment.

So our 144 boxes of packages would provide 30,240 meals to children in the Dominican Republic.  Isn't that great!  They can even tell us exactly where our food will go and when it should get there.  Those packets are enough to feed 83 children for one year.  

The ingredients from our one hour of work cost $6,653, so Feed My Starving Children relies heavily on the kindhearted donations of people around our blessed country.  We are lucky enough to live about 10 minutes from the warehouse, but Feed My Starving Children will come to you, bring all the supplies and equipment necessary for your group to participate in the effort.  They have a minimum amount of money that must be raised before they come, but they will come.  

One sister from our congregation talked about her mom's experience with the organization out in Southern California.  She told a few ladies about it and they all wanted to participate.  They held community fund raisers, raised $150,000 and Feed My Starving Children came to them in Southern California with all the supplies and their stellar organization.  They had a packing event and the members of their community were able to package the food bought with their own money.  Pallets and pallets of food packets were distributed around the world thanks to the work of those good women, their community, and Feed My Starving Children.

There are multiple locations in Minnesota, Illinois, and one location in Mesa, AZ if you just want to schedule a visit.

I just can't say enough good about this group.  This is not a sponsored post either!

These are the bins of soy and rice distributed to each station and refilled constantly throughout the process.

These are the stations, just one row of stations where we worked.  After the work is done, any food that is spilled on the table is scooped into bins and given to a local hog farmer to use as pig feed.  I was super impressed at Feed My Starving Children's attitude toward their donated product.  They respect the donations given to them and go to great lengths to make sure no food is lost.  Not a crumb is wasted.  I was also impressed by motto, that we need to live on less so that others can have a little more.  We are so, so blessed here in America.  There is no end to our wealth.  Imagine all the good that can be done if we all consumed less and gave to organizations such as this.

Following the packing hour, all were invited to participate in a blessing on the food before it was shipped out.  We were given the choice to be there for the blessing or head back to the classroom area for the closing presentation.  

This is where we learned how many boxes we packed and how many children would be fed by our work.  Stories were shared, complete with photos of just a few children fed by the organization.  They come into a village for one year.  This little girl was 3 when they arrived.  She weighed 9 lbs.  Can you believe that!  A 3 yr old that weighs 9 lbs!

After one month she already had meat on her bones and her weight was up to 11 lbs.  You could just see the change in her face.

There is a gift shop next to the classroom where they sell goods from these countries they serve.  All proceeds go to more ingredients for more packets of food.

What a great activity for a field trip.  We met so many different people from all over Minnesota, all gathered together hoping to do a little big of good.  If you are looking for a worthy organization to serve, check out Feed My Starving Children.  They totally impressed me.  Their facility is clean, modest, but organized.  Every employee was anxiously engaged in the cause, kind, friendly, and totally approachable.  I just can't say enough about Feed My Starving Children!

Poor Baby!

Caution, This post has Very Yucky Pictures of Emmalee's mouth, tumor {aka-Molar Baby}, and surgery!!

I mentioned before that we found a tumor in Emmalee's mouth 4 days before Christmas, right?  Well, now you get to hear the whole story.

I was on the computer Monday morning, December 21st, 2015, trying to make a template for the Death Star Nerd Shelf while Madison and Emmalee were in the middle of some sort of sisterly tickle torture.  I was getting totally annoyed with the loud belts of screamy laughter and nearly said something a couple of times.  Luckily I didn't or I think I would have felt even worse when Madison gasped from the other room.  She called me over right away.  

Madison caught sight of the molar baby when Emmalee had her mouth wide open for one of the gut-clenching laughs.  The minute I saw it, my stomach dropped to my knees and a flood of anxiety washed over my heart.  There was no mistaking that bumpy mass in her mouth for any sort of normal canker sore or even swollen gums.  It was thick, red, and looked like a wad of raw hamburger in the back of her mouth.  I had to send her off to play and compose myself for a few minutes.  I was literally frozen in terror.  And only a few moments earlier I was crabby about the noise coming from 2 happy girls.  What a stupid thing to be crabby about. 

I called a local pediatric dentist as soon as I could pull my wits together.  Trying to describe it over the phone was pointless.  The receptionist and the dentist both said they figured it had to be a canker sore, until they saw it.  Even in the office I tried to warn them, "Just be prepared.  It is really wicked looking.  It is a mass, not just a canker."

I didn't think my stomach could fall any further, that is until I saw the horror on the dentist's face.  She poked.  Emmalee had no feeling in the mass.  After a few minutes of the both of them just staring terrified at the lump the dentist apologized, but she didn't know what it was.  We were given a referral form and a phone number for a local oral surgeon and sent on our way.  

Here we were, 3 days before Christmas, I had finally shut my Etsy shop down after 3 months of no sleep and barely functioning as a human being.  We had a list 5 pages long of things to get ready for Christmas and suddenly none of it mattered.  

I begged and pleaded for the Oral Surgeon's office to get us in before January.  After much pleading we were given an appointment the next day.  Luckily, the Oral Surgeon looked at it and was pretty confident he knew what it was.  He grabbed his dental hook and told me if we were lucky, this was a mushrooming type of tumor, meaning, it comes from a small area and kind of pops up, covering a large area like an umbrella, but that area of attachment is very small.  He poked at the mass with his hook and his face lit up.  He said, "Look!  See, when I pull it, it separates from the gums."  He sent us away confident this tumor could be cut out cleanly.  

I was more than a little upset to find out they could not get my Emmers in for surgery before New Years.  We were finally able to get an appointment on New Years Eve, but it just made me sick to think of that "thing" in her mouth, possibly harming my baby girl.  Somehow we had to make it a week before we could get that thing out.  Emmalee was fine.  She was a little shaken up emotionally, but she wasn't in pain or physically affected by the tumor at all.  Me....I was another story.  I bawled the rest of the day out in the garage as I worked on the Nerd Shelf.  I imagined what my life would be like without my baby girl I fought so many years to get pregnant with.  I imagined what it would be like to bury my baby.  I imagined my sweet, so-missed grandma who passed away 5 years ago coming and taking Emmalee by the hand and walking off with her.  It just made me bawl harder.  

I know it sounds crazy, but I guess that is how I deal with hard things.  I immediately think of every possible scenario, what the outcomes could be, how I would feel, how my family would feel, how I might react, and how I know I do not want to react.  I am not a sudden reactor.  You can ask my little sister Kallie.  She makes fun of me all the time because she can't get a reaction out of me no mater how shocking her remarks.  I think it has something to do with growing up in a house where temperaments exploded so unexpectedly.  Reacting only made things worse.  I just wait to see if what I perceive is really how things are before any emotion surfaces.  Inside I am a whirling vortex of anxiety, thought, and panic.  The shell on the outside is staring off as if lost in thought.  

The next week was spent trying to put on a happy face.  We usually LOVE our break between Christmas and New Years.  I bawled alone.  I bawled with Madison.  We just kept consoling Emmalee, promising her the doctor could take that molar baby out and she would be just fine.  Every day of that long week I fought off that sick feeling in my stomach hoping that everything would be OK.  New Years Eve finally came.  Emmalee was nervous, but so excited to get that thing cut out. 

Emmers was so brave.  She took the needle stick with grace and the surgeon was able to work on her without using gas.

I watched as he cut and nipped at the mass.  My stomach flopped when I saw her blood trickle from the first few slashes.  The point I had to look away was when he started scraping at the bone trying to get every last piece.  The area of attachment was about 1/3 the area that the tumor covered.  It was great that the wound didn't cover as much mouth as the mass, but it was still a large area so they wheeled in the laser.  Emmalee LOVES to tell people that she had lasers in her mouth.  They used the laser like a pen, drawing over the wound to cauterize or seal the area.  

About 5 minutes later, we were done.  The molar baby was out.

It was packaged up and sent off to pathology.  2 weeks would be our wait.

Emmalee thought it was her birthday when they brought her her very own carton of ice cream.  She was so excited and the assistant to the surgeon thought she was so brave, Emmers got a second carton to take home.  

It was during this 2 week wait that I finally got into the doctor for my own issues.  I had been bleeding for weeks, passing clots every couple days.  That week of vacation I started passing clots every day.  In August I had a DNC for the same thing, the doctor hoping it would help.  At that point my doctor was convinced I had uterine cancer.  I had my own biopsy sent off, so for about a week the SewCakeMaker family was waiting for 2 oncology reports.

As for Emmalee, her lump came back benign.  It was such a relief, I can't even express it.  Her diagnosis was pyogenic granuloma.  So apparently these tumors are common for children, but on their neck or arms.  The only time they are ever found in the mouth is in pregnant women.  The sources I found said that pyogenic granulomas are always benign, unless they are misdiagnosed and are actually a very rare form of cancer.  So, that week between Christmas and New Years we knew it was benign, unless it was misdiagnosed.  Luckily, thank the Good Lord in Heaven, the molar baby was benign and Emmalee hasn't had to think about it again.  

A week after getting Emmalee's results, I went in to have my unplanned hysterectomy and tried to find the least bit of excitement for this new, off to a terrible start, New Year.

2016, I was full of terror as I watched the ball drop on New Years Eve.  I know now, just as I knew then, that you are not going to be an easy year or very nice to me and my family.  Luckily, on New Years Day I saw this posted on my FB friend's wall and found direction in it's message...

After the encouraging words from this man whom I love with my whole heart, I resolve to find the bright side, to REMEMBER there IS a bright side.  I re-plant my feet on faith-formed sod.  

2015 was hard.  It taxed me in ways I never would have volunteered for, but if I focus on the negative things, I would totally miss the miracles that happened.  We were SO BLESSED last year.  When I thought about this quote, all at once I was FLOODED with remembrance of the miracles and tender mercies of my Father in Heaven that accompanied every single day.  This molar baby thing was just one more moment that ended up being a blessing dressed as despair.  Even if Emmalee's tumor had not ended up benign, I feel like this experience would have been a blessing.  I was able to take a few days, after months of being a terrible mom, working like a dog just to keep my head above water, but unable to be alive and interactive with my kids.  I had those days to examine my life, my role as a mother, my child, how life would be with one less baby to hold at night.  I had just a glimpse of what so many mothers are facing right now, their baby with a terminal illness.  How would it be to find out your baby had, not a benign tumor, but a real, cancerous, parasitic mass slowly consuming the life of their little one.  I am thankful for that glimpse.  I don't think I could have gained the compassion for those struggling families without having gone through this experience.

So, forward we will trod, through this year that is sure to bring heaps of more troubles dripping with unimaginable blessings and insight into God's plan for all of us.  I will take it.  I will do my best to find the good.  I will Act, and not be acted upon.  After all, I am the only one who controls how I react to situations I find myself in.  I am the only one who can open my eyes to see the sunrise after the long, cold night.

Harrison

Meet my new nephew Harrison!

This little guy got a fast pass to life last week.  He was born 5 weeks early, while I was in Las Vegas, and he will never be able to make it up to me ;0}

It's ok, cause I sew*ed up a storm of blankets, pacifier rings, and more just knowing he would be born before I got home.  Harrison's family stopped by my house for a few pictures before going home 3 days later.  This little darling was a miracle, born so healthy he didn't need time in the NICU!

He was 6 lbs 14oz.  They say babies gain one pound a week, so if he would have waited until his due date Harrison would have been just under 12 pounds!!!  Maybe the boy was supposed to be born 5 weeks early after all.

So, I should probably mention that my sister is obsessed with Harry Potter.  Yes, Harrison is already called Harry.  Of course we had to add a little magic to his muggle-captured photos.

I made this outfit.  I sew*ed the tie to a onesie, made a super quick sleeper gown to look like the vests they wore, and then popped out the dress robes.  I don't like to toot my own horn, but I am still a little shocked I could make this outfit without a pattern in a little over an hour.  We didn't have much notice before Harry got to our house, lol!

Now, we had to include the sorting hat!  I made the hat too, but I will let you in on a little secret...I added the face to the hat with photoshop.  Waha!  It looks pretty good though, I think anyway.

Here is a photo of it before the face was added.

I love photoshop!

So, little Harry, sweet dreams and I hope many magical muggle-loving moments are yours.

And hurry back cause Auntie Nessa's arms are very empty since you left ;0}